4 Signs Your Employer Will Ruin Your Career

"No one will hire me."

Jim Walters was blacklisted. His former boss tried to ruin his career. When potential employers contact Jim, they will ask for a letter of recommendation.

So he sent it to them.

Inevitably, these employers decided that they did not want to hire Jim. All 12 employers issued invitations to hire, but after contacting his referee, they all went back on their word.

His former boss is trying to ruin his career.

Looking for your next position? SitePoint Remote Job Recruitment Website can help you find the best remote work in the tech field.

Key Points

• Note long-term emotional negation: If your employer always denies or devalues ​​your feelings and thoughts, this is a sign that they may harm your career and personal happiness.
• Beware of the dependence and drama triangle: In a workplace where you keep saving yourself or becoming a victim is toxic and can hinder your career.
• Identify mandatory control strategies: Employers who exert excessive control over their employees’ personal and professional lives often create a suffocating environment that will ruin your career.
• Understand the impact of how you are "selled": The way employers treat you during the recruitment process often reflects how they treat you at work. Early disrespect or deception is the main red flag.
• Avoid control employers to protect your career: Identify and avoid employers who use fear and manipulation because they will not only make your work life painful, but they can also ruin your career.

Maybe your boss is terrible

Maybe they are a tyrant who focuses on controlling you. Or maybe they are mindless micromanagers who harass you about your work. However, the real problem is:

Will your boss ruin your career?

At first glance, this doesn't seem to be a reasonable question.

Who cares? They didn't really ruin my career. What can they do, and report it to me?

A bad boss can ruin your career. The longer you spend with them, the more inevitable the damage you cause.

But what?

Is there no law to protect employees?

It's almost the same.

In most cases, the law is limited to eavesdropping on private oral communication, anti-discrimination, equal opportunities, etc. What else?

Employer, your boss, can do almost anything you want.

Don't believe me? Let's look at a few examples.

• Linn Gobert was fired because her boss didn't like the bumper stickers in her car. When her boss saw her stickers, he said, “Either work for John Kerry or work for me.” She refused to remove the stickers and was fired immediately.
• The best lock companies in Indiana fired employees who were drinking at their homes. What is the reason? Their president believes drinking is a sin. They even refused to pay unemployment benefits. Johnson County Community College has installed hidden cameras in their bathrooms and locker rooms. They claim that workers have no privacy rights. Worse, they were at large.
• Glenn Hillier was fired by an advertising agency. In the 2004 presidential campaign, he asked President Bush some embarrassing questions. A client of his company was offended and reported the matter to Hillier's boss. A day later, Hillier lost his job.
Lewis Malterby in his book "Can they do that?" 》 details the abuse faced by workers.

This is the problem.

Your employer

know

they can do whatever they want. The vast majority of employees know this, which is why so many people work in fear. Dysfunctional employers feed on your fears

They use sadistic and dysfunctional behaviors to get the results they want from their employees. Then, once you are exhausted and run out of it, they will throw you away.

When this happens, you will be considered a defective product.

The future employer suddenly becomes nervous about hiring you. You are blacklisted directly or indirectly by your dysfunctional employer. Suddenly, it was difficult to find a new job.

This is the characteristic of a career being destroyed.

It will slowly and gradually approach you. Ignore these signs and wait too long, the damage caused may be irreversible.

The worst thing is.

The vast majority of developers will automatically reject these signals. "

This won't happen to me," they said to themselves. Their rejection is based on a variety of reasons.

Most people think the solution is somewhat lower than them.

Some people are afraid that they will dig out unpleasant things.
• My company is not like that,
They said to themselves.
• Others think that “work hard” or “do the job well” is enough. (No.)
The situation is very good, so why bother now?
• As developers, we create various reasons to avoid facing stupid or unpleasant things. But the sign of a bad employer is there, shouting to keep our attention. You can protect and save your career…if you know how to interpret these signals. The following are four signals, numbered from 4 to 1...

Signal #4: Long-term emotional negation

Negrity is an attempt by others to control how you feel about something and how you feel this way.

It is achieved by rejecting, mocking, judging, or minimizing other people’s thoughts, values, or feelings. This is a destructive part of the work, and most developers have seen it as a normal, daily part of the work. What does that look like?

Creation of procrastination patients. Fear of failure, perfectionism, or lack of concentration are all the causes of procrastination. Sadly? All three reasons are actually different aspects of the same problem. Make a mistake, and you may lose your job.

• Silence and indifference. Those colleagues who care little about work and are eager for weekends/holidays/vacations etc. Due to interpersonal dynamics, the idea of ​​working at work has completely lost its appeal to them.
• Distracted colleagues focus on all the wrong things. They are not engaged in exciting projects, are not trained more, or are not in the environment of their choice. So these developers focus their time and energy on doing as little as possible.
• Fear. Your manager or boss asks for "honest comment" or "feedback" at the meeting. Everyone lowered their heads. They stare at the table or their hands. Everyone in the meeting knew that feedback or honest opinion was the code for telling me what I wanted to hear. If you mess up, you will be out of work.
• A organization that fights these dysfunctions will encounter a predictable problem. A-level developers will leave soon, while B-level and C-level developers will try their best to survive.
The people who left behind absorb these bad habits like sponges, carrying them wherever they go, ruining their careers in the process.

Most developers will allow their bosses, their employers to hurt their careers—even after learning about these details.

Why?

They don't think feelings/emotions matter. "I'm a logical thinker and I'm very sober. These things have no effect on me." That's why this is a problem.

This is a lie.

This is because logical decision making is a myth.

University of Southern California professor Antonio Damasio made a surprising discovery. His research focuses on people with normality in every aspect, with only a few exceptions. They all have damaged edge systems.

They don't feel the emotions at all. This leads to a surprising but unusual problem.

No of Damasio's patients was able to make a decision.

They were able to describe logically what they were supposed to do, but without emotions, they found it very difficult to make the simplest decisions. These people cannot decide what to eat, when to eat, or even how to eat.

Damasio found that emotions are absolutely crucial to decision-making.

The situation is even worse. Negative emotions, fear, stress and anxiety can lower your performance. Whether we like it or not, these emotions are slowly eroding our ability to perform, providing dysfunctional employers with ammunition they need to hurt our careers.

Signal #3: Dependence and Drama Triangle

This is a silent epidemic, dependence in the workplace. This is something that makes developers (and employees) generally feel pain. But, what is it?

This is a simple definition.

When I pay more attention to your desires, goals, fears and setbacks than you. This is a behavioral problem, it covers itself in many different ways. Boss of micromanagement Give up your work routine to help colleagues

Allow others to earn honors for your work

• Feeling forced—almost forced—to help an irresponsible colleague solve the problem they created
• Provide unsolicited advice
• Control others with guilt, helplessness, threats, shame, advice, manipulation, domination, etc. Precaution that the problem doesn't exist or isn't as bad as it is actually.
This is not a complete list. It aims to demonstrate the kind of behavior that exists in a dysfunctional workplace.
Why is this important?
The Drama Triangle is an unhealthy model of social interaction. In an unhealthy bad situation, developers and employers play dysfunctional roles, and everyone is fighting for control.

It works like this.

This dynamic acts in our interpersonal and professional relationships. Here is an example of what it looks like.

The employer decided to be a

rescuer

Their employees realize that they earn less than their friends and feel victimized and are cheated by their employers because their wages are not high enough.

1. Employees request a salary increase. Employers feel exploited (Victim status), say no, become a
perseer
2. , telling their employees that they need to see performance improvement first. The employee becomes angry and vows to retaliate. They take action to become persecutors, punishing their employers and their colleagues as much as they can.
3. Employees retaliate, complete the cycle of persecution, and destroy the company. Sounds a bit extreme, doesn't it? I mean, who would bother to do such a malicious thing? Ask JournalSpace. JournalSpace is a blogging platform. The keyword is used to be
because their IT staff (the same person who was found stealing something from the company) maliciously deleted the main database (no backup). JournalSpace closed immediately.
4. This is how his employer describes the whole incident.

   is the person in charge of IT (yes, and the one I found stealing from the company, doing destructive operations on some servers on his way out) choosing to rely on RAID as the only backup mechanism for SQL servers. He sets up automatic backups for HTTP servers containing PHP code, but it is confusing that there is no backup system for SQL data. Ironically, one of his hobbies is to tell everyone how smart he is.

   Please note that both the employer and the employee decided to persecute each other. They all have their own roles to play, but they are unwilling to assume any responsibility for the role they play in this incident. This is the destructive force of the dependence and drama triangle in work.

   Signal #2: Forced Control

   Many employers and organizations have problems with mandatory control. This is one way employers use to maintain power and control over their employees.

   The control area is usually concentrated in the following aspects:

   Psychological control may manifest as emotional blackmail, social exclusion, cold violence, bombardment of love and psychological games.
   • Physical control usually takes the form of bullying and workplace bullying.
   • Sexual control can be as extreme as exchanging money for benefits, or as subtle and complex as exchanging attention for money
   • Financial control usually comes in the form of obedience in exchange for rewards, rather than receiving a raise based on ability.
   • Legal control. If your employer owns your personal program, there is a problem. If they focus on restrictive confidentiality agreements, demanding non-compete agreements, you are under control.
   Bosses and colleagues may also show control behavior through...
   Request absolute loyalty and complete dedication
   • Details of directing employees' personal lives
   • Propose unexpected and unreasonable requirements for employees
   • Use shame, guilt and fear to gain submission
   • Give favors and rewards to compliant workers.
   What are the symptoms of a controlled employer/workplace?
   Addiction to control. The boss and manager seem obsessed with power and control over subordinates. Their behavior is always for themselves.
   1. Low or decrease in productivity. Unhappy employees are inefficient or inefficient. Scientific research shows that fear, stress and anxiety can lower your performance, remember?
   2. Poor behavior and low emotional intelligence. Employers and colleagues show what John Gottman calls the Big Four Knights. Criticism, defense, cold violence and contempt. These behaviors can undermine the culture, morale of the workplace and most importantly relationships.
   3. Egocentric behavior. Controllers think they know what your problem is before telling you. They provide unsolicited advice and then get angry when you don't take their advice. They simply don’t understand why other people think and feel differently than the way they think and feel.
   Dysfunctional employers use financial leverage to gain and maintain control over their employees.

   However, you already know.

   Most employees know. They are scared because dysfunctional employers control their careers. If you are already part of the dysfunctional tissue that shows these symptoms, you have many options.

   You can get out. Maybe it’s finding another job to reduce the time you spend with your employer, or you can work remotely, be a freelancer, and apply for transfers. That's the point. No matter where you are, even if you feel trapped, you have a choice.

   But what if you haven't been hired yet? Is there a way to detect these red flags in advance?

   Absolutely...

   Signal #1: How they sell you is how they serve you

   Matt Buckland is a human resources director; he is responsible for recruiting candidates at his company. One morning, while he was taking the train to work, an impatient commuter pushed him away. The rude commuter yelled at Buckland and told him to "go**self". The commuter began to gush insult Buckland, continuing to insult him in his way.

   Buckland and his rude commenter will meet again in a few hours…for a job interview.

   Awkward.

   Karma: The one who pushed me away on the subway and suggested that I go to ***Our guy just came to his interview...and with me...

   — Matt Buckland (@ElSatanico) February 16, 2015

   This awkward example is two-way.

   The way employers treat you in preliminary negotiations is often a good instruction on how they will treat you once they hire you. Or, as the saying goes, “How they sell you is how they serve you.”

   It is difficult for employers to hide these signals.

   They may be able to hide some of these signals, but they simply cannot hide all of them. If you know what you're looking for, you'll see these signs anywhere.

   From other employees, customer reviews, and even suppliers and partners. You are looking for trends in bad behavior.

   Can you see real behavioral problems?

   What is a problem hidden under these symptoms? It's control.

   Each sign points to a control problem. A controlling boss will spare no effort to make you surrender to their will. Lynn Gobert was fired because her boss didn't like the bumper stickers in her car. Barbara Webber was fired for her pregnancy.

   This becomes very strange.

   Employee was fired for taking an approved vacation, almost died, and having a tattoo - just say whatever you want. But in each case, the root cause is the same: control behavior.

   Among the vast majority of employees who have lost their jobs, most people never fully recover to their previous levels of mental health, self-esteem, and life satisfaction.

   But that doesn't really ruin your career, doesn't it? I mean, you can get another job, right?

   It depends on the situation.

   Why? Background check. It will appear in your background check when you are fired or terminated. What do employers assume when they see it?

   You are a defective product.

   If you are lucky, the amount your employer is willing to offer, your benefits and rewards will all drop. If you are unlucky, like most employees, you will have a hard time finding a job.

   Want to protect your career?

   Avoid control-type employers. Read customer reviews, talk to former employees, contact suppliers and partners, and search for potential companies on Glassdoor.

   Bad bosses do not necessarily mean ruining a career.

   Control behavior is a red flag.

   Employers use control behavior to get the results they want from you, their employees. Then, once you are exhausted and run out of it, they will throw you away.

   You can protect your career. If you avoid controlling behavior, you can avoid your career being ruined. If you are a good developer, you are good at your job. You are reliable and focused - a A talent.

   Don't let a controlling boss take all this away. Set clear boundaries. Focus your time and energy on the right employer and you will find that they desire and are willing to protect your career.

   ---

   Want to learn more about employment and salary? Please check the following link:

   • 10 ways to keep programming skills sharp between jobs
   • Salary Negotiation Guide for Software Developers
   • How to find a development job without experience
   • 10 Popular Technical Skills That Don't Need to Coding
   • The best programming languages ​​by job needs and salary
   • 11 high-paying remote jobs in high demand in 2016
   • 5 easy strategies to double your salary
   • How to retain employees and avoid employee turnover
   • How to negotiate a higher freelance rate

   View SitePoint Premium for more books, courses and free screen recordings.

   FAQs about Employer Career Destruction (FAQ)

   What are the signs that my employer is destroying my career?

   There are several signs that your employer may be ruining your career. These include being excluded from important meetings or projects, receiving unfair negative performance reviews, noting a sudden change in your employer’s attitude toward you, or being deprived of opportunities for career development. If you notice these signs, it is important to address this issue directly with your employer or HR department.

   Can employers blacklist me?

   Yes, employers can blacklist you, although it is illegal in many jurisdictions. Blacklisting means employers share negative information about former employees, preventing them from finding new jobs. If you suspect you have been blacklisted, you may need to seek legal advice.

   How can I know if I have been blacklisted by my former employer?

   It's hard to know if you've been blacklisted. However, if you still struggle to find a job despite the necessary qualifications and experience, this may be a sign. You can also seek feedback from a potential employer, or hire a reference inspection company to conduct a survey.

   What should I do if my employer tries to ruin my career?

   If you think your employer is trying to ruin your career, it is important to collect evidence of their behavior. This may include email, performance evaluation or witness testimony. You should also report this to your HR department or seek legal advice.

   Can I take legal action against employers who are trying to undermine my career?

   Yes, if you can prove that your employer is deliberately destroying your career, you can take legal action. This may include claims for unfair dismissal, discrimination or defamation. It is important to seek legal advice to understand your choice.

   How can I protect my career from destruction?

   To protect your career from destruction, it is important to maintain a professional attitude, keep a record of your work and achievements, and build a strong relationship with colleagues. If you suspect vandalism, please resolve this issue directly with your employer or HR department.

   What is career destruction?

   Professional destruction is the action taken to prevent an individual from making progress in his or her career. This may include spreading rumors, rejecting opportunities for career development, or unfairly criticizing performance.

   Can the former employer ruin my career?

   Former employers may damage your career by providing negative recommendations or blacklisting you. However, such behavior is often illegal and can be legally challenged.

   How can I recover from career destruction?

   Recovering from career destruction can be challenging, but it is possible. It is important to stay professional, seek support from a mentor or professional coach, and focus on rebuilding your reputation. If the vandalism is serious, you may also need to consider taking legal action.

   Can employers ruin my job search?

   Yes, employers can ruin your job search by providing negative recommendations or blacklisting you. If you suspect this is happening, it is important to seek legal advice.

The above is the detailed content of 4 Signs Your Employer Will Ruin Your Career. For more information, please follow other related articles on the PHP Chinese website!