The Opt Out: 10 rules for better internet etiquette

You are more than a data point. The Opt Out helps you reclaim your online privacy.

The internet's vastness allows diverse interaction styles; some openly share their lives, others prefer privacy. This wouldn't be an issue in isolated online spaces, but our digital worlds are interconnected.

Sharing online reveals information about others—a lesson learned from Cambridge Analytica and TikTok's identity reveals. Online privacy is a collective, not just personal, concern.

The Opt Out proposes a code of conduct. While we can't dictate online behavior, we can highlight the offline consequences of online actions. Consider these rules, adapt them, and share them. Collective awareness fosters greater online privacy for everyone.

1. Consent is Paramount

Respecting boundaries requires consent. Before sharing photos, videos, stories, or anything depicting others, obtain their permission. This includes background appearances; a seemingly innocuous shot could inadvertently reveal private information. Similarly, seek consent before sharing written content mentioning individuals, especially details like email addresses, phone numbers, locations, or workplaces—avoid inadvertently aiding stalkers. Content involving children is especially sensitive; always obtain parental/guardian consent and consider obscuring faces. Never post about someone intoxicated, asleep, unconscious, or unable to consent; refrain from taking such photos/videos altogether.

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2. Filming Strangers: Proceed with Caution

While not condoning rudeness, filming strangers, even for seemingly justifiable reasons (e.g., "Karen" videos), is problematic. Online videos lose control; they can lead to doxing, disproportionate consequences, harassment, and even assault. Social media rarely distinguishes between malicious intent and simple mistakes.

Exceptions exist: Filming might be necessary in emergencies (assault, hit-and-run, etc.). However, carefully consider the best course of action (calling 911, attracting bystanders). Avoid posting such videos on social media unless absolutely necessary to help someone who's been arrested or hospitalized. Even in court, footage's impact can be unpredictable.

3. Keep One-on-One Messages Private

Treat private messages (texts, photos, videos) like confidential information. They are intended for the recipient's eyes only; do not share them. This especially applies to intimate images.

4. Share Contact Information Consensually or Publicly

Publicly available contact information (e.g., email addresses on websites) is permissible to share. Otherwise, always ask for permission before sharing someone's contact details, specifying what and with whom you'll share it.

5. Minimize Information Sharing

Unintentionally revealing information is common. An unboxing video might reveal your address; a lunch photo could expose your workplace. Be mindful of details that could reveal more than intended, both about yourself and others. Blur or cover sensitive information on photos (packing labels, documents, license plates, boarding passes). Check backgrounds for revealing details. Remove metadata from images before sharing. Avoid words directly linking you to someone; "colleagues" reveals employment details.

6. Password Sharing: A Personal Decision

You have the right to privacy; you don't owe your partner access to your accounts. Password sharing is a personal choice; it's acceptable if both partners are comfortable, but it's not a requirement for a healthy relationship.

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7. Establish and Enforce Your Boundaries

Communicate your online privacy preferences with others, especially those who frequently post online. It might require multiple conversations, but clear communication ensures your comfort and respect for your boundaries.

8. Post Activities, Not Companions

If you haven't discussed online privacy, post about your activities but avoid identifying companions. Include only those who explicitly consent. Omit identifying details (tattoos, cars, etc.) that could reveal others' identities.

9. No Consent, No Tag

Ask permission before tagging someone on social media or using their information in other contexts (contests, promotions, hashtags). Consider the potential for unwanted exposure.

10. Consent is Fluid

People's privacy preferences change. Even if someone frequently posts, always ask before sharing content featuring them. Show them the post, provide veto power, and offer options. When in doubt, assume privacy until informed otherwise.

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